Name: Kick-Ass (the film, for now)
Occupation: Um, it was a comic and now is both a comic and movie
Status: Brain-child of Mark Millar and John Romita Jr., turned into moving pictures by director Matthew Vaughn
Most known for: sending comic and movie nerds into frenzy, myself included
First known for: sending just comic nerds into frenzy, myself not included because I’m late to the comic book game (wah wah)
Up next: there are already talks about sequel’ing and not sequel’ing, but on March 16th, Mark Millar told Total Film that there was a sequel in the works, and that he would start writing in April
Why you crushin’?: I was lucky enough to last-minute win tickets to the local screening of this thing last week (and had an impromptu tweet-up with Kim!) and it was uh-mazing. Obviously (and I said this sentences ago), I am way behind on every comic in existence, so I hadn’t read this beforehand. I bought it weeks ago, but just hadn’t had the time to read it before I saw it. I wasn’t sure what to expect, or how much I’d fall in love. But everything was glorious. It didn’t hurt that the cutestuff playing John Lennon in Nowhere Boy, Aaron Johnson, was the lead, my two-weeks-ago Crush played one of his friends, and everyone’s favorite (500) Days of Summer-little-sister was the baddest ass of them all. Throw in Nicolas Cage and McLovin’, and I don’t understand how this movie would be bad. I can’t wait to read this jawn!

Same with Morgan, I’ve got these in no particular order and there are plenty more with these came from.

I wish this was better quality.
I couldn’t find a satisfactory still of my first couple, but that’s no mind because this scene – wherein Lorelai Gilmore and Luke Danes kiss for the very first time – is adorable enough. Now, unless you watched Gilmore Girls, though, you won’t really understand the banter and awkwardness that makes this couple, which is extremely prevalent throughout the scene (and much of their relationship). Don’t even get me started on Luke’s surprise daughter, Luke and Lorelai’s breakup, Lorelai’s dumb and short-lived marriage to Christopher, and that absolute sham of a final season and series finale, though. I like to remember them in simpler times, thank you!

I searched high and low for an illustration of Nancy Drew and Ned Nickerson together, to no avail. And, while I, of course, enjoyed Emma Watson and Max Thieriot playing the parts in the 2007 film, I just really enjoy having my own mental image of my favorite literary couple. We all know how much I love Ms. Drew (hello, look at this website’s title and handle!), and my love for Ned could equal hers. He can be a bit of a ninny, and he might not give her the credit she’s due in how amazing she is at catching the bad guy, but he loves her unconditionally anyway.
In my favorite book of last year, Confessions of a Teen Sleuth, writer Chelsea Cain paints a different story – while married to Ned, Nancy’s actually in love with Frank Hardy, of the Hardy Boys!

“When Ice Met Cream” from When Ice Met Cream EP
The Brunettes continue to be one of my favorite, most-adorable bands of all time and, although Heather Mansfield and Jonathan Bree aren’t a real-life couple (I hear they used to be, though), the songs he writes and they sing are just about the cutest love notes anyone can hear. There isn’t much more to say that I didn’t already say last September – I just frigging love these two together, whether they’re “together” or not.

How often in life have you had that “oh my God, I love Josh!” revelation? It doesn’t happen as often as you’d imagine, and the odds of that revelation actually leading to mutual feelings is probably astoundingly low. Throw in the strangeness of this person being sort of, kind of, ex-related to you, in a way, and there’s weirdness all around. Maybe I wasn’t such an on-point! movie-watcher back then, but I had no idea this Cher Horowitz-Josh Lucas romance was budding until just before it blossomed. Clueless was a film I watched endlessly and still managed to get all goosepumpy during the pseudo-montage of awkward scenes between these two until their “legs crossed towards each other”. Looks like I know what I’ll be watching today!

The facts are these: Ned Piemaker (the dude had no last name!) has a unique and unexplainable gift of bringing the dead back from the dead with a touch of his finger. Once said dead person is back from the dead, Ned has one minute to put them back to death by touching them again, or someone else will die. After the minute is up, the newly undead’s impending re-death is still always at the fate of Ned’s touch. Childhood sweetheart, Charlotte Charles (known as Chuck) died. Ned hadn’t seen her since he was shipped off to boarding school after his mother and her father died (as a result of him finding out about his gift). When he sees her again, dead, he brings her back to life (there is more to this, but I’d be typing fah dayz) and keeps her alive, thus unintentionally – but kind of intentionally – killing someone else. Now, though, he can never touch her again. Imagine being so in love with someone, but knowing the second your skin grazes theirs, they’ll be dead. IMAGINE IT, I SAID! I have never, in my entire little life, held my breath throughout anything the way I did while watching Pushing Daisies. The chemistry and absolute adoration between Chuck and Ned is indescribable, and I DARE YOU to watch one episode and not feel on-edge and happy and jealous and butterflies and sad and joyous and in love with life – all at the same time. I said none of these couples were in any sort of order, but fuck if I’m not going to say Chuck and Ned are my favorite couple of all time! Fictional or non-! Looks like I know what else I’ll be watching today!

Ok, so there’s no way I could write a more put-together introductory paragraph about It’s a King Thing than the one written by lead singer, Brian Mietz, on their official website:

It’s a King Thing is from the Haddons, the Hills and the Heights of suburban Philadelphia. Their music can be defined as rock songs with a pop sensibility. Influences include The Lemonheads, the first two Weezer albums, the first two Weston albums and a bunch of tons more. Our band’s songs can beat up your band’s songs.

Please also take a minute to read each member’s bio (on the above website) written by one of the funniest dudes I’m too shy to talk to in person, Nick Minetola. And probably read the other stuff he wrote that is linked there as well. I did a while ago and just did again because.

It’s a King Thing’s new album Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo. is now available for free download on said above website. Give it to anyone and everyone you know that can make them the next New Kids on the Block! | Become a Fan

(I like this picture because it makes her on television, like Martha Stewart or Julia Child.)
Now we leave the block and enter the kitchen, where Jaime bakes things, takes drool-worthy pictures of them, and rubs it in your face on Cream & Sugar Kitchen. No joke, I’ve tried to eat through my computer screen on more than one occasion while browsing the goodies she’s made over these past several months.

But not only does she give you the direction to make these things yourself, she speaks to you on a friendship-type level. She’s also not afraid to get real and quippy on yo’ ass. She writes like she speaks and, being a big fan of that kind of blogging myself (OBVS, Y’ALL), it’s refreshing. Though we live, what?, ten minutes away from one another?, I don’t see her as often as I wish, so I like to think we’re having a conversation through our respective websites.

You can follow her quipping on the daily at her Twitter.

And then we have Ghouls on Film. You may remember me bragging about a girl named Sara back in November and, well, I’m just going to continue to do so here.

She currently writes for Comcast’s Reel News (I wish I could link to just her stories, but you’ll have to scroll through for “SaraC” – or check it all out!), but her true love is horror films. She’s enlisted the help of your very own narrator (and the above Jaime, among other friends) to contribute to the blog as often as they’d like. Thus far, I’ve written two pieces (bloop! bloop!), but please read the rest – add it to your Google Reader, link it on your blog, tell your friends. Let’s make this a big deal, right?!

On top of the above links, you can also find Sara on Twitter (where she helps you find the pieces she wrote by linking to them after she writes them) and as for Ghouls on Film, you can now Become a Fan.

Never forget to check the above “Exit” link to find other people and places I find wonderful, as well!

Name: Cornelius Crane Chase (a.k.a. Chevy Chase), Daniel Edward Aykroyd
Occupation: both are comedians, writers, and actors; Dan is also a winemaker, musician, and ufologist(?!)
Status: Chevy has been married thrice, but the last one – to Jayni Luke – has been going strong since 1982 (cute!); Dan has been married to actress Donna Dixon since 1983 (cuter!)
Most known for: both are known for writing and performing in the first season (and, for Dan, first few seasons) of Saturday Night Live as part of the original Not Ready for Prime-Time Players; after their respective stints on SNL, they went on to star in loads of amazing movies through the late seventies and eighties.
Recently known for: Chevy currently stars on my top new show of last year, Community, as Pierce Hawthorne (ever notice how Joel McHale’s character is, basically, a young Chevy?); Dan has lent his voice to Ghostbusters: The Video Game, released a charity album about growing up in Canada entitled Dan Aykroyd’s Canada, and promoting his Crystal Head Vodka through Niagara Cellars (he’s also a Reserve Commander for the Harahan, Louisiana Police Department?)
Up next: Chevy will guest in the film Hot Tub Time Machine (yep, and please to enjoy the trailer connected to that link – it’s unsarcastically amazing); Dan will be lending his voice to the Yogi Bear film (obvs, playing the title character), and is currently filming Dorothy of Oz, playing Scarecrow (word is still out on what’s going on with Ghostbusters III)
Why you crushin’?: jeeze, I feel like I’ve been writing this entry for an hour. So, I’ve finally broken into the very first season of Saturday Night Live. I’m only three episodes in, and it is way weird and awkward and different than how it is today (could “weird” and “awkward” actually be considered different, though?), but these two dudes are already awesome and attractive. I can’t wait to continue to cringe through the rest of the season. And I’m also ready to finally crack open the book Live From New York: An Uncensored History of Saturday Night Live, as Told By Its Stars, Writers and Guests, written by James A. Miller. It’s sitting on the coffee table, staring at me with disappointment right now. It’s been sitting there for days.

To kick off the new year, I am combining a few of my favorite things: cats, cartoons, comics, and – of course – gingers. As you know, if you know me at all, the only comics I’ve semi-regularly kept up with are of the Archie variety; Archie, Betty & Veronica, Sabrina the Teenage Witch, and Josie and the Pussycats. And, since I’m still a little wary of declaring my undying Ginger love to Archie, I’ve picked my second favorite Archie-ginger, Josie James/Jones/McCoy (will we ever know her true last name?).

For Christmas, I was the lucky recipient of the complete television series from 1970, and I plan to marathon the ess out of it before school starts again in just a couple of weeks (wahhh). Not only that, but I haven’t watched the 2001 live-action film version, featuring Rachael Leigh Cook (remember her?), Tara Reid (omg), and Rosario Dawson (she came out alive!) in a long, long time. I think it’s about time I crack that out, at least to recite my favorite line of any film ever: “I’m so pretty and popular!” Ok, wait, you’d have to see the movie to find that line even remotely giggle-worthy. And after my recent purchase of Absolutely the Best of The Archies, I should probably get my hands on Josie and the Pussycats: From the Hanna-Barbera TV Show, if I can find it at all. (Of course I already have the film’s soundtrack, duh!)

In other words, welcome your first Ginger of the Month – of the new year and decade – by rocking the frig out to this:

I suck at segue, so, whatever, here are my lists.

TOP NEW TELEVISION SHOWS!

1. Community – this show, I want to marry it. I was very wary of this new NBC Thursday night comedy when it first came around. I loved the people I recognized, but I’d been hurt just two years prior in the sitcom area (I’ll miss you forever, Aliens in America, even if you were on the CW and not NBC!). I didn’t want to be hurt again. I didn’t want the show itself to disappoint, and I didn’t want to get too attached in case my fellow television-watchers let me down again. Neither party did, and I find myself cackling, pausing and rewinding, and making my quintessential “what is going on!” squeal every week. <3
2. Eastbound & Down – total surprise smash of the summer. Danny McBride is, most probably, completely insane. I don’t know how anyone on the show can make it through any line of dialogue they are given. Six episodes has left me with the shakes. I need it to come back before I start tweakin’.
3. Modern Family – from the moment the Eddie Munster looking dad proclaimed that he was so hip to the “kids’ lingo” that he knew “WTF” stood for “Why The Face”, I knew I’d be thinking about this show whenever a love song played on the radio. And, no, I don’t think we’ll be leaving the honeymoon phase anytime soon, I’ll thank you.
4. The Middle – honestly, I am feeling very proud of my Nielsen Families for watching this show. This is totally a show that is under-appreciated, under the radar, and completely in the shadow of Modern Family. Normally, I’d snarl at the name Patricia Heaton, but this role is just about perfect for her. She is completely forgivable and not at all “I can’t effing stand her”-able. I watched it for the Janitor, but I’m loving it for Charlie McDermott.
5. Glee – duh! Despite my hatred of their “we’re singing to a recorded track when we should be singing live”, and the absolute lack of continuity their writers possess, I still watch this show every week (and, ok, yes, I tear up during most musical numbers). I’m hoping this “Winter Break” will have them coming back much better.

TOP FILMS!

1. (500) Days of Summer – I did lots of soul searching for this list, man. I watched so many movies – lots of them pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty good – and to even narrow it down to five was tough as hale. But I thought hard; I saw this movie thrice in theatres, and I know I’ll probably watch it hundreds of times within the first few months of DVD-owning. Of course I love it because Zooey Deschanel is in it, but it’s also a supremely well-written and acted piece of cinema. So stop hatin’.
2. A Serious Man, In the Loop – fuck you, haterz, I’m allowed to have a tie! This is my list, you dicks! Ok, A Serious Man was – seriously – one of the best movies I’d seen in so long (mind you, my first (500) Days viewing was during the Philadelphia Film Festival in, like, March?). And it was such a surprise! The trailer does nothing for the film itself. Same with In the Loop. Such a delight to go into a movie thinking, “ok, I’m seeing this movie” and then, by the time you leave, you’re crying from hysterical laughter and can’t stop thinking about it. Uh-mazing.
3. I Love You, Man – Paul Rudd and Jason Segel. “Joban”. The slapping of a bass guitar. RUSH?!?! I can’t even explain this any better.
4. Inglourious Basterds – I blame my (somehow) only seeing this film once and it not coming to DVD until Tuesday for it being so low on the list. Also, I almost feel a little guilty or wrong for loving it so much. It was a fantastical movie, and my family had to fight for the wrong side during that war. I just don’t feel like I’m allowed to cheer along, you know? Either way, this film brought me Christoph Waltz and an interview with Quentin Tarantino in some screenwriting magazine that sort of changed my life.
5. Zombieland – I am absolutely terrified of scary movies. Well, hold on, I’ll clarify: scary movies made after the eighties that deal with torture or stuff that could happen in real life (I’m talking Scream or Funny Games) are movies that I cannot and do not watch. Now, zombie movies? Totally my cup o’ tea, and this particular zombie movie was just about perfection. I liked every single actor, and every single actor played their part extremely well. I can’t believe I only saw it once.

TOP ALBUMS!

1. Dead Man’s Bones (featuring The Silverlake Conservatory of Music Children’s Choir), Dead Man’s Bones – I’m just as surprised as you are! In a year where Neko Case released an album, I’ve given my top spot to someone else. Not to take anything away from DM’sBs, but I think this decision had a lot to do with expectations. I didn’t know what to expect from Ryan Gosling and his buddy, Zach Shields. “Actors making music” is always a crap-shoot, and especially when you find said actor to be attractive and charming, you can easily be swept up in the beauty (like that episode of The Partridge Family when David Cassidy couldn’t hear how terrible that girl was, because he only heard angels singing when she opened her mouth) or disappointed to the point of second-hand embarrassment. Luckily, I felt neither! I was so impressed with RyRy’s voice (as well as this Mr. Shields fellow), the haunting feeling of the entire record, and the drearily romantic lyrics. I am very excited for their next project, which I hope will be around soon.
2. Neko Case, Middle Cyclone – like I said, I just had such high expectations; and, not that the album was in any shape bad, I just don’t feel like I’d gotten my fix. I hadn’t even heard of this lady until her album before this one (Fox Confessor Brings the Flood), so these past three years were spent downloading every song she’s ever recorded and listening to the shit out of them. When it came time to finally hear something new, my hopes were just so fucking through the roof high that it was inevitable that I be slightly disappointed. I still love her with all of my heart, though, and listen to the album (and her old stuff) often.
3. Regina Spektor, Far – I feel like Regina is constantly an underdog in my life. Poor girl just doesn’t seem to be as ginger as Neko or Jenny Lewis, and she’s so reserved, I sometimes find myself forgetting about her and that’s just really shitty of me. She is a wonderful songwriter and so dang charming in concert, it’s just not fair that she always come in third to those two. This album of hers might be my favorite yet, and her song with Ben Folds on his album was effing adorable.
4. The Lonely Island, Incredibad – don’t judge, man. I know this album should hardly even count, but you don’t run this list – I do. I am a fan of comedy albums (stay tuned for my Favorite Things of the Decade post and you will see), and when they are comedy albums full of songs, I like them even better. Saturday Night Live has felt a ressurgance with the help of Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer, and Jorma Taccone and their weekly Digital Shorts; and these songs were featured heavily in those spots. I’ve loved these dudes for way many more years than SNL has, and I was stoked to finally get to listen to their ridonk songs as often as I wanted (though, they are severely lacking in having the Bing Bong Brothers song I’ve had on my iTunes for forevs).
5. The Sounds, Crossing the Rubicon – I’ll be honest: the only reason I even picked up their second album, Dying to Say This to You (which was my first of theirs), was because I could see that girl’s nipple on the cover. I was presently surprised to not be disappointed in their Runways-style sound at all. I was a huge fan of Sahara Hotnights before this and the Swedes have yet to let me down. And, on a personal note, Maja Ivarsson is the reason I have my tattoo where it is (clicking on her name will show you!).

TOP SONGS!

1. St. Vincent, “Actor Out of Work” – for realsies, I haven’t listened to this song in a while, but for a long time I played it just about every day. And, listening to it again just now, it is still one of the best two and a half minutes you’ll ever hear.
2. Monsters of Folk, “Say Please” – again, I’ve said it millions of times by now, but I will for.ev.er regret missing their concert. Forever.

3. Ben Folds and Regina Spektor, “You Don’t Know Me” – I told you this song was effing adorable.

4. Pete Yorn and Scarlett Johansson, “Relator” – haters, you can see yourself to the left. I think ScarJo’s voice is just fine (speaking and singing), and this song is just so fucking catchy. Unfortunately, the rest of the album doesn’t live up, but that’s whatever.

5. Dead Man’s Bones, “My Body’s a Zombie For You” – argh to the song’s file being too large to upload! You can listen to the song at that link. This song is just so horrifyingly cute. It makes me want to drown myself and then crawl through the dirt, out of my grave, and have Prom.

TOP BOOKS!

1. Confessions of a Teen Sleuth, by Chelsea Cain – this is the only category where I allow myself to list things that weren’t necessarily released this year. I am so damn behind on books, in general, that it would be impossible for me to even find five books from this year that I’d want to read. Anywho, this book is perfect. I am OBSESSED with all things Nancy Drew, and this was totally on par to keep the addiction alive. You’ll only understand the majority of what happens in this book if you’ve read a good number of real Nancy Drew books (or, I guess you could study Wikipedia a bit beforehand, but that’s really lamesauce). Satire at its best and really enlightening in regard to learning about other fans’ insights and opinions on relationships and Nancy’s life.
2. I’m Down, by Mishna Wolff – omgosh! I just checked, and this one was published this year! Score! Alright, this memoir was amazing. I don’t know what made me buy it (actually, I think I might’ve seen it featured in BUST magazine and couldn’t stop thinking about the cover), but I recommend it to anyone needing recommendations on books to read. I guess it might help if you had an even slightly similar childhood to hers (I grew up in a predominately black neighborhood and was the whitest of white that ever whited; still am), but I don’t know. I think the humor and the way Mishna writes will have you hooked regardless. I felt myself getting so angry with the people around her at one point, I didn’t even want to keep reading. But, I did. And I finished the book in about two days.
3. Candy Girl: A Year in the Life of an Unlikely Stripper, by Diablo Cody – dudes, this book was craycray. I bought it immediately after hopping back on the I <3 Diablo train and, I think, I read it in less than a day? I shouldn't brag because it's not like it's a thousand-pager or anything, but I might've skipped meals and classes to read it. I couldn't stop! Not only is she obviously hilarious, but some of that stuff she went through and, er, did was … indescribable! My virginly, prudish eyes couldn’t lap it up quickly enough! Basically, I blushed through the whole thing.
4. The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian, by Sherman Alexie – I’m very surprised with myself for having what is, essentially, a school book on here. I was required to read this for my Writing Children’s Stories class this semester – something I am so, so thankful for. Sure, it’s a kids’ book (Young Adult, really, though!), but it was so funny and heartfelt; honestly, I cried from laughter and sadness multiple times while flipping through. Just read it, ok?
5. Wishful Drinking, by Carrie Fisher – I’m really into memoirs (and fakes ones, a la Confessions of a Teen Sleuth)? I don’t know that I had any idea as to just how funny Princess Leia really was. I learned so much about her (some no one would care to know, which is what makes it even funnier), and got some good views into her life with her mom (Debbie Reynolds, one of my idols and future Ginger of the Month). I only brag about how fast I read these books to prove to you how great they are: this one, I think I read in two days. Some jokes fall a little flat, and she goes off on some tangents that I don’t think come back to her original thought? But that’s ok with me. I do the same thing.

TOP WEBSITES!

1. Twitter – obvies, duh! But seriously. I know it’s been around for a few years now, but I only started mine earlier this year (mainly for Coachella). Now I’m over five thousands tweets in and completely way too into it. I like having peeks into the lives of my favorite celebrities (and, like, it’s nice that this peek is what they want you to see, you know? It’s not like some paparazzi set up a live webcam and I’m spying). I’ve learned to love and loathe some of my favorites, and I met two amazing people this year because of it: my wife, Erin Winterbottom, and my mentor, Dave Finkel (though I’ve only met the former in real life).
2. The Awesome Summer Journal – I can’t remember what series of links brought me here, but it’s on my very short list of blogs that I found and never left again. Kim takes the most beautiful pictures of, well, everything! I am in complete love with her cat, Felix, and it was through her advice and help that this ol’ thing even exists (she pointed me in the direction of DreamHost, which is just that: a dream host). Follow her on Twitter, too, losers.
3. uh, this place – I have no clue what anything on that page says, but those cats!!!! I visit this site every few days just to see what they’ve gotten themselves into this time (hint: it’s usually boxes).
4. MY MILK TOOF – most probably one of the cutest ideas I’ve ever seen, that is equal parts entertaining and well-executed. I’m so sad I missed out on buying the book she had for sale for a bit, and the postcards, too! Damn my poorness.
5. Circle the Cat – this is how much I love cats. When I’m not cuddling with mine, loving on Kim’s, or staring at cats from another country, I’m playing a game that involves trapping one with dots.

TOP THINGS!

1. Beatles Rock Band – this was only released three months ago, but it has become my number one good time!! I can sing on “hard” and play bass on “easy” at the same time now!! And Ringo’s drumming doesn’t scare me! Seriously, if any of you people are ever having a Beatles Rock Band party, I’m invited.
2. Archie Gets Married – I was infuriated when news broke that Archie was going to propose to Veronica. I’ve calmed down a bit after reading through their story and now starting his and Betty’s (it’s all a dream-type-thing!), but I’m still on pins and needles! Honestly, he can never choose between the two. It’ll end the excitement of it all (though, I wouldn’t be impartial to him choosing me over both of those clowns).
3. my MacBook – quite possibly the best purchase I could ever make. I don’t have to go upstairs to use the computer anymore!
4. NoDoz – I saw lots of midnight movies with the help of these guys, and I also wrote a slightly insane post about Tina Fey when I accidentally OD’d on them (you’re only supposed to take one and I took two, forgetting that they weren’t Aspirin)! But seriously, folks:

5. ION Television – this is very new, but I am very thankful for it. When it’s not playing Jesus stuff, it has been running millions of hours of reruns of Criminal Minds, a show that I’ve recently gotten into (with thanks to the fucking adorable Matthew Gray Gubler; stay tuned, he’s an upcoming Crush!).

TOP CRUSHES!

1. Ryan Gosling – I don’t know what more I can say that I haven’t said in this post and the post that you’re reading right now. This dude is pretty amazing. On top of turning into one of the most talented actors working today (and from Mickey Mouse roots!), he’s also a phenomenal musician and, from what I hear, really, really nice. He cares about the world and the suffering in it, he cares about the things he does in his own life; and, personally, I had so much fucking fun at the Dead Man’s Bones concert those weeks ago (despite the insane cold, wet weather and delay). I love him forever, and when we are married, I will delete this post so he doesn’t find out that his wife is an insane person.
2. Bill Hader – this dude. He has the most adorable laugh, one of the best faces, and he cracks me up before he even says a fucking word on Saturday Night Live. Too bad he has a kid now (half-joke!).
3. Mindy Kaling – of course, her character on The Office annoys the everloving shit out of me, but it’s just a testament to how amazing she is that I can look past that and love her in real life (or, you know, as “real life” as following her on Twitter can get). The fact that she wrote a play about Matt Damon and Ben Affleck – and played the latter – in college is also incredible. I want to see that play. I am so utterly jealous of her life.
4. Joseph Gordon-Levitt – as if I didn’t love him enough in my top movie of the year – (500) Days of Summer, did you forget already? – he goes ahead and hosts Saturday Night Live, complete with reenacting my absolute favorite number from my absolute favorite musical (Singin’ in the Rain) in his monologue (and a big, whopping “fuck you!” to NBC and Hulu for not having a clip of the monologue, and forcing YouTube users to take theirs down – thanks for being awful). Then I saw him irl when I was in Los Angeles, and my JGL circle was complete.
5. Bethany Fong(-Grayson) – ok, I didn’t think it’d be fair to have one real-life friend on my list, but then I remembered I was only going by Crushes I’d named thus far, and I’ll use that as my excuse if anyone feels left out. This girl is cute, funny, into comics and awesome bands, and is the secret wife of one Boy Wonder. I’ve still yet to meet her in real life, but that just makes her fit into this category all the more – all of my unattainable crushes!

TOP WASTES OF TIME!

1. Ellen Page and Alia Shawkat (and random grossest-dude-I’ve-ever-seen), abusing the “Don’t Stop Believing” trend – seriously. I like those two girls, but what in the living fuck are they doing? I know they were going for hilariously awkward (or even awkwardly hilarious), but they failed at both. I watched this with no expectations at all and I was left feeling so cheap.
2. most of this season of True Blood – let’s all come clean, yeah? The first season was so deliciously, awfully, poorly-written(ly) bad-good, and then this season was full of a bunch of episodes that resembled one another; and that one episode was so terrible. That demon, clove-footed woman wasn’t supposed to hang around that long, and if everyone’s eyes went black one more time, I had a noose on the ready to just end my suffering altogether. The only savior of the whole thing was how banging Evan Rachel Wood is (despite my annoyance with her, and how unlike her character she was, according to Sookie Stackhouse book readers) and how unforgivably adorable Jessica and Hoyt were. I couldn’t stand the cute! But, really. Make it better next year, please.
3. planning my wedding to Jim Halpert OR John Krasinski – it was bad enough that fake Mr. Krasinski knocked up his on-screen girlfriend-turned-fiance, then he actually married her! THEN, to kick me harder in the crooked teeth, John Krasinski goes ahead and proposes to Emily Blunt. Needless to say, I immediately shredded my wedding dress and cancelled my ceremony and reception-reservation at the New York Library.
4. all of my talk about studying abroad next spring – I haven’t broken the news to you kids yet: looks like mommy isn’t moving to Scotland for four months after all :(. I realized that, while I’m not old, I am old. I want to get my would-be career going, and hanging out with the gingers of the world won’t help that. Plus, I sort of lucked out with changing my mind; I got my financial aid reward letter for that trip (they sent it before I changed my mind, but I received it after), and I needed to raise eight thousand bones for it. Uh, no, I’m poor.
5. not following Donald Glover back on Twitter way months ago – this one is my newest revelation (literally, I realized this mere minutes ago). I like to multi-task, so I was watching Comedy Central’s Hot List and typing this thing up, and Donboy joked about his Twitter name (@DonGlover = dong lover). Of course, I looked it up; the color scheme looked familiar for some reason, so I snooped around. I visited his website only to find a very familiar picture (this one to be exact) staring back at me. I remember that picture followed me for a few weeks before unfollowing me (I presume because I’m lame and also because I didn’t follow him back). And now he is my future Crush and one of the stars of my Top Show of this year. Dude has lived and continues to live my life! We could’ve become best twuddies, and I blew it.

Well then. Despite ending this on a depressive note, I retract my initial paragraph at the top of this post. This was a delight to write! Everything on this list was and continues to be important to me, and I hope I turned someone on to something good. Also, if you click on any of the Top Albums, you’ll find a download link. Not sure if any songs or full albums are locked or anything, but go to town!

Shit, son. I’m watching last night’s Law & Order and Benjamin Bratt is on (playing his old character, obvs). Dude just lost his wife to MS and Lieu is sick and they’re talking about Lenny! I’m an emotional wreck now, bye.

I’ve had fairly large dogs my whole life. Ever since The Norm Show, I’ve wanted a wiener dog, and what’s cuter than a long-haired one? (Hint: the answer is “nothing”.)

I’ve got six thousand books and comics to still read, but why not buy me some more? I’ve seen the film version of Harriet the Spy enough times; it’s time for me to read the book by Louise Fitzhugh. And I forget where I even first came across Philippe Halsman’s Jump Book, but I need it. Pictures of people jumping? PERFECTION. And, yes, of course I’d like a living, breathing, 1964-era John Lennon in my stocking this year, but his book In His Own Write, will suffice. (I suppose.)

This is the Barnes & Noble nook. I want this over the Amazon Kindle, honestly, 97% because I like the word “nook”. But really, I’m still unsure whether I even want this at all! I love books. I love magazines. I love the smell that radiates from flipped pages, and tearing out my favorite ads or fashion spreads to save for a later date (that never comes). I like the idea of electronic books, as physical paper books can tear and wear (if you’re a total klutz like me), and some are pretty heavy. But, really, any book I’d purchase and read, electronically, I’d also want on my shelf. Unfortunately, the world wouldn’t be the same way. And I don’t want books to die :(. I like them and I like bookstores.

I’m so conflicted! But, definitely, get me the first four things, at least. Oh, and Josie and the Pussycats: The Complete Series.